Libido – sexual desire or sex drive – is one of those things that many women struggle with.
Studies in Britain, Europe and America, involving thousands of women of all ages, show that between 30-50% of women have been hit by prolonged periods of little or no sex drive. The causes of this are varied and complex – ranging from the biological to the psychological and even social.
For many people it’s the increasing stresses and strains of modern-day life that leads to a lack of sexual desire. This not only affects our sex life but can also affect our self-esteem, energy levels, sexual responses and our relationship with our partner.
As more of us live life in the “fast lane’ the relaxing, stress relieving, aphrodisiac qualities of aromatherapy essential oils, and the art of sensual massage, can be an effective way to enhance our libido and regain some of that lost sexual desire. This concept is nothing new, as history tells us that aromatic plants have been used for 1000s of years to aid love and romance and to ignite passion! Rose petals for example were scattered by the Romans on marital beds and brides wore crowns of orange blossom to allay their nerves.
Scientific research carried out by neurologist Alan Hirsch at the Smell and Taste Treatment Research Foundation in Chicago has since proven that certain scents can have a powerful effect on the olfactory bulb in our brain, which is a part of the limbic system that houses our sexual desires.
Essential oils for boosting sex drive
There are a number of aphrodisiac essential oils that can help to reduce stress and tension, relieve fatigue, stimulate sexual desire and support those suffering with impotence or frigidity. We’ve profiled a few of the most popular choices below:
Rose essential oil has a strong passionate fragrance and a tender, uplifting and soothing effect. It helps to relieve tension and inspire a confident sensuality.
Neroli essential oil is a gentle and subtle aphrodisiac with a hauntingly beautiful fragrance. It is soothing, calming and uplifting and can be particularly useful for people who are nervous about sexual encounters.
Sandalwood essential oil is a powerful aphrodisiac with a gentle erotic fragrance that is enjoyed by men and women alike. It has a relaxing and uplifting effect on the mind and body and is particularly effective when there are sexual problems caused by stress and anxiety.
Ylang Ylang essential oil has a sweet, erotic aroma. It helps to promote relaxation and relieves nervous tension and inhibitions. It is particularly suited to women, helping them to find their inner femininity, confidence and sensuality.
Jasmine essential oil has an intoxicating, heady fragrance. It is emotionally warming and uplifting and helps to inspire confidence and optimism. It is also one of the most powerful aphrodisiacs and can help couples to reignite their sexual spark.
Clary Sage essential oil is a powerful relaxant and stress-reliever that can have an almost ‘euphoric’ effect. It can be especially helpful where sex drive is being affected by external stresses. (Safety note: should not be used in conjunction with alcohol).
Patchouli essential oil has a relaxing, uplifting and sensual effect. It is soothing and slightly hypnotic and excellent for reducing stress and anxiety. It has a very distinctive aroma though that some may not like.
Other choices of oil might include stimulating essential oils such as Black Pepper or Rosemary which can be useful where fatigue is affecting sexual desire.
Sensual massage
Essential oils can be used in a variety of different ways, however massage is by far the most effective method of application in this instance. Aromatherapy massage is not only healing, soothing and nurturing, but can also be sensual and erotic. Time taken between couples to experiment with massage techniques – and essential oil blends that both can respond to – can counter-balance some of life’s pressures and help reconnect couples under pressure.
Many couples are afraid to experiment with massage in case they “get it wrong”. However, basic massage techniques are easy to develop – especially if you have professional treatments yourself. A basic massage course could help if you are worried, or an instructional video. Most massage books also show good step by step techniques. Here are a few basic rules:
- Never put pressure on the spine
- Never cause pain – always ask for feedback
- Never use essential oil blends on “intimate parts” of the body
- Use gentle pressure and always massage up towards the heart on the limbs.
- Use clockwise circular motions on the abdomen.
- Be careful of your own back! It is easy to strain your own back if giving massage in bed – not very romantic but true! Putting a duvet/towels on the floor means the pressure of your massage isn’t just absorbed by the mattress, and gives you a more stable base if you don’t have a massage couch.
Libido boosting aromatherapy blends
Here are some wonderful aromatherapy blends to boost your sex drive. Alternatively get creative and make your own blends, choosing oils that you like the smell of. Remember – when experimenting with your own blends – less is more! We generally recommend a 1.5% dilution rate for massage – this means a maximum of 13 drops of essential oil in 30ml of carrier oil. Do not use more than one drop of strong oils such as Black Pepper or Ginger!
Passionate Pulse Point Perfume
20ml Jojoba Oil, 4 drops Ylang Ylang, 1 Ginger & 5 Grapefruit.
Sensual Room Spray
150ml Rose Hydrolat, 2 drops Rose essential oil, 2 Jasmine, 6 Sandalwood & 6 Bergamot
Aromantic Bath
15ml Bath Oil, 2 drops Clary Sage, 2 drops Patchouli, 2 Neroli & 2 Mandarin
Aphrodisiac Massage Blends
- Stimulating: 30ml base oil, 2 drops Rosemary, 1 Black Pepper & 5 Orange
- Relaxing/Uplifting: 30ml base oil, 5 drops Sandalwood, 2 Jasmine & 5 Bergamot
- Euphoric: 30ml base oil, 4 drops Clary Sage, 5 Ylang Ylang, 2 Neroli & 1 Black Pepper
Alternatively you could try our ready to use Sensuality Massage Oil which has been expertly blended with Rose, Sandalwood and Ylang Ylang!
Good luck and most importantly have fun experimenting!
Joannah Metcalfe
Consultant Aromatherapist
Disclaimer & Safety Advice